Love and logic are the Catholic answer to MAiD, says international pro-life apologist – BC Catholic

“The pro-life response to assisted suicide is not only the right response,” says pro-life apologist Stephanie Gray Connors. “It’s the beautiful and inspiring one.”

Catholics need not be discouraged by Canada’s onslaught of “extreme” euthanasia, because common sense and compassionate action offer effective ways to counter the culture of death, Gray Connors told about 200 people at Our Lady of Assumption Church in Port Coquitlam.

Gray Connors lives in Florida with her husband and two young children, but hails from Abbotsford, where she attended St. John Brebeuf Regional Secondary. A prominent pro-life speaker, debater and author for a quarter century, she is back in the Vancouver area for the summer.

Gray Connors said that a fundamental response to any pro-euthanasia argument should be a response to the desperation and fear that often underlie a death wish. This fear reflects the patient’s sense that their suffering is meaningless.

As philosopher Viktor Frankl wrote, “Everything can be taken from a man except one thing: the last of the human freedoms: the ability to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way,” Gray Connors said in an interview.

Her talk told stories of people who have suffered greatly but found deep meaning in their situations. “Following Frankl’s insight has given me hope, and I wanted to share those stories to give others hope as well,” she said.

That hope begins with a foundation of prayer, upon which Catholics can build a structure of compassionate yet logical responses and actions, she told the audience.

She gave a hypothetical example. If the law allows assisted suicide, why do we withhold such help when someone threatens to jump off a bridge?

“Either everyone gets help with suicide, or no one gets help,” she said.

People seeking euthanasia often cite their fear of pain, but most pain can be relieved through treatment, Gray Connors said. “Shouldn’t we be relieving the pain rather than eliminating the person experiencing it?”

Someone who hopes for death because of mental anguish may receive answers aimed at repairing the broken relationships that are often the cause of their despair, she said.

Likewise, a response to patients seeking euthanasia who say they don’t want to be a burden to others should be an offer to “lighten their burdens,” not eliminate the individual who feels burdened. “Add a new perspective,” she said.

Another common motivation for euthanasia is the fear of a ‘bad death’. Here, better palliative care should be our answer.

Finally, those who seek assisted suicide may do so out of a sense of futility, which can be responded to by celebrating the simple yet profound fact of their “existence.”

“If someone feels worthless, we need to help them find their value,” says Gray Connors.

She shared a video of a nursing home that opened a daycare center, showing how the sick and elderly can find new hope and meaning in their lives through interaction with young people.

Another video shows how a man who lost both legs and an arm in an accident finds new meaning and hope by focusing not on what he lost, but on the beauty of existence.

The man experienced a profound insight in the simple act of watching a snowball melt. “If we love such moments passionately, then perhaps we can learn to live well—not in spite of death, but because of death,” he said. “Let death take us, not the lack of imagination.”

Father Larry Lynn, the archdiocese’s pro-life chaplain, said he was encouraged by Gray Connors’ presentation. “Viktor Frankl’s work is incredibly important to the pro-life argument,” said Father Lynn, who is pastor of Our Lady of Lourdes in Coquitlam.

“When we discover the meaning of our suffering, we can name it and own it… Christians know that our suffering has been given meaning through Christ on the cross… When we embrace this, our suffering has a purpose and we can withstand anything.”

He said Gray Connors’ presentation was a breath of fresh air, especially for those who are just beginning to understand the magnitude of the euthanasia problem in Canada. “Hope is the answer. We must never lose hope, because hopelessness is the path to destruction.”

Gray Connors has walked a difficult path in recent years, losing four children to miscarriage. She says her pro-life ministry stems from her faith.

“What keeps me going,” she told The BC Catholic, “is the belief that it is God’s will, that people’s lives are improved when they learn a message that is good and true and beautiful, and the belief that I have a responsibility to use the gifts that God has given me to evangelize the culture.”

Those gifts – and the confidence they give her – were on heartwarming display during the question-and-answer portion of her presentation, when her husband, Joe, brought her crying 3-month-old daughter, Molly, onto the stage.

Gray Connors took her without hesitation and began to breastfeed her discreetly, under a cloth.

“It’s the perfect pro-life moment,” said a laughing onlooker. “Just perfect.”

In August, Word on Fire Catholic Ministries will reissue an updated and renamed version of Stephanie Gray Connors’ 2021 self-published book on euthanasiaStart with something: 10 principles for thinking about assisted suicideThe . BC Catholic You can read a review of the book at bccatholic.ca/startwithwhat.

Inspired by BC Catholic MAiD Edition

Stephanie Gray Connors’ presentation on euthanasia should inspire Catholics to do more to promote the culture of life, according to the priest who opened his church to her.

Father James Hughes, pastor of Our Lady of the Assumption Parish in Port Coquitlam, said in an email interview with The BC Catholic that Gray Connors gave the audience, which included dozens of lifelong Catholic pro-life advocates, helpful ideas about how to listen to and respond to the suffering in our culture.

“We can do more in our parishes to support palliative care, to set up bereavement groups, to reach out to our elderly and those who are at home so that their isolation and suffering can be heard,” Father Hughes said. “It is not easy work, but it saves lives and souls.”

He said the approach to Pro-Life Sunday in June prompted him to ask his assistant pastor to consider ways they could devote their Sunday sermons to a pro-life topic, specifically euthanasia.

“I was inspired by an entire issue of BC Catholic in early June that was dedicated to the topic,” he said. “I’ve never come across this before in relation to previous issues of BC Catholic. I found the articles thought provoking and so we had some talking points on the topic.”

This then led to him inviting Gray Connors, who he had known since he was her spiritual director when she was in college.

“Stephanie gave an insightful and practical presentation of the topic, which allowed us to better understand the compassionate and logical side of the debate,” said Father Hughes.

Moreover, he said, she showed that Catholics still have work to do within their parishes and communities.

“This topic,” he said, “only leads us to more necessary conversations about a God who also suffered for us and ultimately loves every human being.”

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